2 more days..

Posted on Tuesday, Apr 24 at 11:28 pm

..to SYF!

For the past few days, my cca peeps were so high about SYF and informing each other how many days to SYF. Whenever we see any cca friends, we will show the finger sign showing the number of days left. 3..2.. and tomorrow, it will be one.

Today is the 4th day after knowing the truth. I’m not blaming anyone for telling me the truth, cause 长痛不如短痛. At least i will not pin any more hopes but shift my focus to other things. It’s hard to adapt, but I WILL SURVIVE!

4 days ago(friday 20 april), i found out something, a secret that really affected my mood throughout the whole CCA practice. Sorry guys that i didnt have dinner with you all, and didnt tell you what happened. I think i will just hide this thing in the heart instead of saying out. Suddenly, it started to rain. Perhaps 心情不好,所以希望雨水能冲走一切不愉快的事. Went out for a short walk in the rain. But luckily wasnt sick. Shirley accompanied me, and she’s sick now. During night practice, we changed to our costume and shifted our instruments to the hall to practice the walking in and out. The Floorball people were in the hall having their friendly match. But, we managed to “chase” them out of the hall..heak heak heak.. After practice, ben told the yr2s about yr3s stepping down on the SYF day (26 april) itself and the new cca positions for the yr2s to choose. At the time ben said this, tears slowly formed. But i told myself, not to cry.. not to cry.. After practice, tuan kiak told me about taking a yr3s group photo together for the yr3s. I totally broke down. I cried infront of tuankiak. No matter how he confronted me, it didnt make a difference. Shirley came and lent me her shoulder. I’m started to be emo.

You may feel strange or puzzled, why i’m so emotional about such things. But, CCA is just like my 2nd family. Where all the family members care for each other, always be there for each other whenever i need help. I have alot of friends there.. Shirley, sherlynn, edith, sera, cuijun, yichuang, ben, yihong, tuan kiak, junlong.. and many many more.. I can say that CCA friends are much closer as compare to classmates. Although we have practice only for 2 times per week, but everyone is always available for each other for 24-7. Alot of 不舍得s. And soon, i have to pass down my role as angklung sectional leader. Seeing my section improves day by day.. From nothing to something. The effort that ive put in.. And soon, i have to say good bye.

I finally settled down my feelings after the hug from shirley. Then, tze kiat and leong talked and consoled me that this is just part and parcel of life. Again, i cried. They were desperate, and kept telling me to cool down.

[23 April, Monday]
3 more days to SYF…

In the morning, went to harmonis for practice. We had a mini combine before heading to the hall for assembly. During assembly, i saw tze kiat and leong again. They talked to me about “3 more days to stepping down” instead of “3 more days to SYF”. I started to cry again. The water tap just worked on its own. And suddenly i heard “sekolah..sediya”. Gosh, I’m soo not prepared. In the afternoon, i saw two of them AGAIN. i kept seeing them these few days, i dont know why. They were trying their best to make me cry again. Saying about the Farewell thing, and sad things, hoping that i would just break down and cry. But, I DIDNT! Perhaps at that moment, ive already immuned to their talks. No matter how sad they described, i didnt let a drop of tear coming down. I’m STRONG! and i MUST BE STRONG.

at night, received sms from brother chuan. He saw me crying during assembly. oh gosh, so embarassing. But, chuan, thanks for ur concern! I will jia u de!

[24 April, Tuesday]
2 more days to SYF..

Again, fingers kept sticking out showing the “2″. Yaya.. i know, it’s 2 more days to SYF! Today is a much better day for me. At least i didnt cry.. Overall, lessons were okay for me. During GP lesson, Mr Tan played a video clip for us. The images in the video impacted me. Reflects how fortunate i am. I like one of the sentences “understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few, you should hold on. work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young“. Good friends are hard to find. They are just like shooting stars, rare.

After school, daddy mummy came. we went to have ice-cream at mcdonald. and came back home and started on my designing. I dont think i have the mood to study now. Super excited about SYF! Woohoo! I’ve made new changes to the blog template. And in the midst of forming the main page. Please bear with me.

Just now, i was chatting with tze kiat..he’s so bad la, wanna make me cry on thursday. I think leong will join him in the “make-me-cry” move too.

anyway, tml is a happy day, i guess. Cam-whoring starts tml! I will take alot alot alot of pictures with my darlings.. It will be the 2nd last time to take photos with them!

-shir-
April 25th, 2007 at 12:00 am

(: girlfriend.you must stay strong ok?no matter what happen, always remember, you have us & the entire MIAKE with you all the way. (: you’re never alone, never walking alone. (:

kiat & leong are right.its part and parcel of our life to go through in & outs.life is designed in such a way, so that we can try out different things, different lives and be immersed in different situations.nothing is forever and lasting.they are forever and lasting because we make them to be.we can’t possibly plunge ourselves into something, and expect ourselves to stay there and not try other things, right?

i know exactly how you feel.from day 1 till today, we’ve spent so many hours, days, weeks, months and years together.two and a half year aint easy for us.we walk thru so much, been thru so much, ups & downs, happy & sad moments, touched & anger…we been thru so much, thats what brought us to where and what we are today. (: friendships so close and precious within ake, realisation & understanding within ake, and not forgetting, the music take-aways & the endless endless wonderful memories.they’ll be forever, because we care, we remember, we cherish. (:

so long as we enjoyed every single day of our life, be it good or bad, as long as we spend it well and fruitfully, we should be glad that we ain’t sorry to ourselves.all these while, it hasn’t been easy to move till here.its time for us to rest, and let another group take over. (: its life gf.i cannot accept it, i dont want to accept it, i hate to accept it.but we got to face it.its a journey that we need to go through.when we stop at a traffic light, we need to move on once the light turns green.its time for the light to change colour.its time for us to move off, and look for new areas to develop in.

but, no matter what happens, ake will always be our lovely home.a place where friendships bloom, love grows and endless concerns reveals.ake will always be our pillar of support, our mental motivation, our life, our everything.no one can change this fact, make it become impossible or a fairytale that “burst” the moment we wake up.a fact is a fact.the fact is, ONCE A MIAKE-IAN, ALWAYS A MIAKE-IAN.no one can change it, no one can deny it. (: its our privilage.a special consent that no one else gets/receives.only us, only MIAKE-IANs. (:

cheer up girl.we will walk thru this together ok? (: no matter how much we feel tomorrow or on thurs, we can cry together, we will all hug together and cry.but always remember, after crying, dry up our tears, move on, and continue. (: we’re just taking a rest from ake.we’re always part of ake.we’re not leaving ake.we physically may have gone, but mentally, we’re always with ake. (: this break that we’re taking may be quite long, but we will be back.someday, somehow, we will all be back at ake.we will never leave. (:

SMILE GIRL.tomorrow is cam-whoring day.and no matter when, where or what, my shoulder is for you. (: FOC with no taxes or interest. (: when you cry, i will cry with you. (: we’ll soak our own blouses together. (: HAHA! =p

alright.lovelove darling.this comment is so “short”. =p

*HUGS*MUACKS*

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