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..to SYF!

For the past few days, my cca peeps were so high about SYF and informing each other how many days to SYF. Whenever we see any cca friends, we will show the finger sign showing the number of days left. 3..2.. and tomorrow, it will be one.

Today is the 4th day after knowing the truth. I’m not blaming anyone for telling me the truth, cause 长痛不如短痛. At least i will not pin any more hopes but shift my focus to other things. It’s hard to adapt, but I WILL SURVIVE!

4 days ago(friday 20 april), i found out something, a secret that really affected my mood throughout the whole CCA practice. Sorry guys that i didnt have dinner with you all, and didnt tell you what happened. I think i will just hide this thing in the heart instead of saying out. Suddenly, it started to rain. Perhaps 心情不好,所以希望雨水能冲走一切不愉快的事. Went out for a short walk in the rain. But luckily wasnt sick. Shirley accompanied me, and she’s sick now. During night practice, we changed to our costume and shifted our instruments to the hall to practice the walking in and out. The Floorball people were in the hall having their friendly match. But, we managed to “chase” them out of the hall..heak heak heak.. After practice, ben told the yr2s about yr3s stepping down on the SYF day (26 april) itself and the new cca positions for the yr2s to choose. At the time ben said this, tears slowly formed. But i told myself, not to cry.. not to cry.. After practice, tuan kiak told me about taking a yr3s group photo together for the yr3s. I totally broke down. I cried infront of tuankiak. No matter how he confronted me, it didnt make a difference. Shirley came and lent me her shoulder. I’m started to be emo.

You may feel strange or puzzled, why i’m so emotional about such things. But, CCA is just like my 2nd family. Where all the family members care for each other, always be there for each other whenever i need help. I have alot of friends there.. Shirley, sherlynn, edith, sera, cuijun, yichuang, ben, yihong, tuan kiak, junlong.. and many many more.. I can say that CCA friends are much closer as compare to classmates. Although we have practice only for 2 times per week, but everyone is always available for each other for 24-7. Alot of 不舍得s. And soon, i have to pass down my role as angklung sectional leader. Seeing my section improves day by day.. From nothing to something. The effort that ive put in.. And soon, i have to say good bye.

I finally settled down my feelings after the hug from shirley. Then, tze kiat and leong talked and consoled me that this is just part and parcel of life. Again, i cried. They were desperate, and kept telling me to cool down.

[23 April, Monday]
3 more days to SYF…

In the morning, went to harmonis for practice. We had a mini combine before heading to the hall for assembly. During assembly, i saw tze kiat and leong again. They talked to me about “3 more days to stepping down” instead of “3 more days to SYF”. I started to cry again. The water tap just worked on its own. And suddenly i heard “sekolah..sediya”. Gosh, I’m soo not prepared. In the afternoon, i saw two of them AGAIN. i kept seeing them these few days, i dont know why. They were trying their best to make me cry again. Saying about the Farewell thing, and sad things, hoping that i would just break down and cry. But, I DIDNT! Perhaps at that moment, ive already immuned to their talks. No matter how sad they described, i didnt let a drop of tear coming down. I’m STRONG! and i MUST BE STRONG.

at night, received sms from brother chuan. He saw me crying during assembly. oh gosh, so embarassing. But, chuan, thanks for ur concern! I will jia u de!

[24 April, Tuesday]
2 more days to SYF..

Again, fingers kept sticking out showing the “2″. Yaya.. i know, it’s 2 more days to SYF! Today is a much better day for me. At least i didnt cry.. Overall, lessons were okay for me. During GP lesson, Mr Tan played a video clip for us. The images in the video impacted me. Reflects how fortunate i am. I like one of the sentences “understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few, you should hold on. work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young“. Good friends are hard to find. They are just like shooting stars, rare.  

After school, daddy mummy came. we went to have ice-cream at mcdonald. and came back home and started on my designing. I dont think i have the mood to study now. Super excited about SYF! Woohoo! I’ve made new changes to the blog template. And in the midst of forming the main page. Please bear with me.

Just now, i was chatting with tze kiat..he’s so bad la, wanna make me cry on thursday. I think leong will join him in the “make-me-cry” move too.

anyway, tml is a happy day, i guess. Cam-whoring starts tml! I will take alot alot alot of pictures with my darlings.. It will be the 2nd last time to take photos with them!